Customer Service, well lack of

I often find myself caught between extremes. Royal Mail are experts at this:

Time it takes for their customer service rep to pull up my account, listen to my query, and give me a sensible answer that resolves the whole thing: just a shade over two minutes from "hello" to "goodbye". That's great customer service!

Time spent on hold before that could happen: also about two minutes. Not great, but not upsetting.

Time spent listening to and navigating around the recorded menus, which includes repeated and non-bypassable encouragement to check the website (if the information I wanted was available on the -ing website, I would not have had to call), before even getting into the hold queue: almost ten whole minutes by the clock. That's not customer service, that's a tenth circle of hell.

Oh Clive, do NOT get me on this rant.I went to Currys at Christmas looking for whatever and a 12 year old whose voice had not yet broken shook his head in a negative manner every-time I asked a simple question. FOR GOODNESS SAKE SALES PEOPLE...KNOW YOUR DAMN PRODUCTS.

Big boys are kerap generally, customer service is just restricted to a customer number....I AM NOT A BL00DY NUMBER!!!and what you are worth to them financially.

Car dealerships? HATE Them all. Oh sure, only too pleased to be nice and efficient when selling you are car but dare you ask them to take it off your hands because you have fallen on hard times...all those tut-tuts and shakes of heads, wrong colour, wrong gearbox, wrong feckin model...WAKE UP AND SMELL IT BOYS...you just bought yeeself some seriously bad advertising!

Estate Agents? Do not think one exists that has ever heard of quality customer service. Condescending, money grabbing no service bumburgers, the lot of them!

Utilities Co's? FORGET it, and BT????? After 942 presses of whatever number I am supposed to press...No, dont even get me going on that one.

Banks?? Are you having a larf Mr Bankers...rhymes with......HOW THE HELL AM I SUPPOSED TO CALL MY BRANCH????? It's all out in forkin Indian call centres...and they call this advancement and better customer service !!!

A well known vacumn cleaner maker ...rhymes with Bison...still waiting for a poxy refund of

As much as a patriot that I am (stands and salutes the Queen), the US has us licked for customer service.

It seems to be a culture thing. Sure the US model can be a bit over the top, and a bit cheesy, but better that than the UK version of no service

Never really experienced or noticed it across Europe, so I wonder if it is just a UK thing, or a general European issue?

Don't get me wrong, I've had some great customer service with UK firms, but when it happens, don't you tend to find yourself telling everyone what a great company/restaurant/shoeshop, as opposed to this being the expected norm?

Or maybe were just all getting old and grumpy

Just like to point out that Mrs Kip pulls faces whenever I get on this subject, but this morning, I phone tech support as emails were not sending (SMTP issue) and not only was it resolved, the support number went to support not a labyrinth of call centres and options, and they were very patient with me, which is not easy, I think i know everything, yet know nothing.

Result = Thumbs up!

Yep but thats the point, we shout out isolated examples, when you should expect that as a minimum.

I remember working on a major issue in my corporate days, we had a code problem with some Windows Servers, after engaging Microsoft UK, we ended up talking to Microsoft US. After 2 of their techies had spent 4 hours trying to resolve the problem, they then decided it would be better to get on site, and if we could hold on, they would jump on a plane and would with us in about 10 hours.

I then told them that they had an office in our little country in the village of Reading, near Londiniom. After which some UK geezer got told to get in his Mondeo and get on site, and then liase with his US cousins.

They then rebooted the server and it fixed it.. no only joking

An extreme example, and no doubt superduper platinum support contract, but I was amazed at the difference within the same organisation.

Granted, but the culture of response also has to be considered.

Some time last year we went for lunch at this quiet, slightly posh restaurant, but there was this 20-something American waiter who seemed to be the new shift manager, and he was Being American about it.

So you had all these reserved British types looking baffled because they were expecting the usual service and no question more intimate than "and how would sir like his steak cooked?", but all of a sudden there was this American kid loudly intruding on conversations, asking to know what they had done that morning, what they intended to do that afternoon, trying to make friends... that's probably great service in the States, but here we don't know how to respond to it and even feel resentful of the intrusion.

Fair point, and I guess its relative to the type of business.

We went to a Mitchellin Star restaurant recently, all very nice and very posh, (less food = more money), but we were fussed over repeatedly, re-arranging cutlery and lots of whispered sorries, just wanted to shout "leave us alone" we trying to have a conversation.

Maybe were never happy?

What i find frustrating is its the Britsih way, stiff upper lip and all that, why are we British too proud to complain.

We all rant and moan about it on forums like this but how many of us actually bother to complain to the organisation thats bothering us

Ok im well known for taking things to the extreme when i complain, so perhaps im not best place to judge but im .... fed up (being polite) of poor service and the mentality of - well take it or leave it or what you gona do about it .....

I totally agree customer service in the uk SUX end of.
I dont have any isolated UK cases of joy that shake a stick in the face of the usual crap service I recieve. its all crap.

Apart from MLS of course who I can whole heartedily recommend. That one was for you Clive.

The us does have it licked and I dont understand why we get the carppy end of the stick seeing as most of our companies are owned by yanks.

Anyway where was I.

Its my birthday on Saturday and a close friend of mine ordered me a ltd edtion T-shirt from a US company they ordered me a Large even though I am a bad fastard. I was dreading the return process. I emailed them and I got the following back.



Dear Leon,

Thank you for contacting Cafepress.com!
I want you to be 100% satisfied with everything you purchase at CafePress.com. I am ordering you a replacement right away in the new size at no additional charge. You should receive the replacement by March 29th.

There is no need for a return! I don't want you to incur any additional shipping charges. Please keep the original as our way of saying thanks for shopping at CafePress.com.

Best Regards,


Angelica M.


why oh why cant we have this level of customer service in the uk.
That last time I ordered a T shirt from play and it did not fit I have to offer up my first born to even be considered worthy enough for an exchange.

anyway rant over.
I am off outside to ram the phneumatic drill up the subby's mantle piece who has been drilling for the last 4hrs 10ft from my office window.